Humorous Oneliners

George Bernard Shaw once said that if you find something funny search it for hidden truth. Here are few pearls of wisdom packaged in humour. Enjoy.

1. You wouldn't worry what people thought about you if you only knew how seldom they did.

2. To expect life to treat you fairly because you're a good person is like expecting a bull not to charge you because you're a vegetarian.

3.Worry is like a rocking chair; it will give you something to do, but won't get you anywhere.

4. Pain and suffering are a lot like gas....they too shall pass.

5. Always borrow money from a pessimist. They don't expect to be paid back.

6. Anyone who says that swimming is good for the figure has never taken a real good look at a whale.

7. A bore is always "ME" deep in conversation.

8. Some people think their lives are full, when really they're just cluttered.

9. If at first you don't succeed, try not to be amazed.

10. A leader without a sense of humour is like a grass cutter at a cemetery. You have a lot of people under you paying absolutely no attention.

Live Better....Laugh More

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Mike Moore is an international speaker and writer on humor and stress management and humor in the workplace.