Showing posts with label be humorous. Show all posts
Showing posts with label be humorous. Show all posts

Sunday, February 28, 2016

A Funny Life Experience: LET’S GO HOME


 

It was a beautiful Saturday afternoon.  You know, the kind of afternoon that shouts to every man, “Let’s go shopping for furniture.”  My wife said we needed a new chair, an ottoman and a painting for the family room and would like to have me there to help pick them out.  My powers of decorative selection are known far and wide, I guess.

I reluctantly agreed but pointed out that my bad back precluded any heavy lifting.  We would have to get their employees to carry whatever furniture we bought, to our van. Carol agreed saying that the last thing she wanted was me moaning and groaning from back pain.

After an hour or three looking we had the items selected and paid for.  All that remained for us to do was to get them to the van, then home where our three grown sons could take over.

When I explained my medical incapacity to the sales person she said that the men who did the heavy lifting were out on a delivery and wouldn't be back for quite a while.  At this point my misguided masculine pride took over and I heard myself saying something like, “I can handle this stuff. It isn't that heavy. ” “Michael, (she always calls me Michael when she goes for emphasis) you will not touch that furniture.  I do not want you flat on your back writhing in pain for two months” “But who's going to carry it if I don’t?” I asked. “We will,” she said, pointing to two attractive, well dressed young sales women.

With that Carol and her squad of power lifters went to work hoisting and carrying the chair, ottoman and huge picture while I, her 6' 3" 200 pound husband, stood watching. We left the store with Carol and her high heeled helpers carrying the furniture while I tagged along behind them looking sheepishly at the six million other shoppers all of whom just happened to be looking directly at me.  It was difficult, but I resisted the overwhelming temptation to explain why I was carrying nothing but my wife's purse. “Let’s go home.”

Just seeing humour in a situation is almost as effective as the laughter it  evokes.

Always take the comic view of life.

Time spent laughing is time spent with the gods. 

 

Mike Moore is a popular motivational speaker who writes and speaks on Humour, Attitude and Human Potential. This is an excerpt from his Book “Light Up with Laughter” (The Humour and Health Connection) A book you’ve got to get to make the rest of your life the best of your life.

Drop by my store and say hello.

Saturday, January 14, 2012

The #1 Quality a Woman Looks For in a Man

The # 1 quality a woman looks for in a man is a sense of humor.  I  have asked women in my audiences if they agreed with this and they unanimously said YES.  The question they say they all ask themselves is " Does he make me laugh?" If their answer is yes then they are more inclined to proceed with the relationship. Interesting!!! Men, want to improve your sense of humor?  Visit Here

Sunday, July 18, 2010

How to Be Humorous and Entertaining in Any Situation

People often ask me if being humorous is something they can learn and I always answer with a resounding,"YES!!" Being humorous and entertaining can be learned and in a very short time too. If you're interested why not take a look at my e-book on the subject. You can find it here and as always I kept my price low and piled on the bonus items for you. Mike

Tuesday, June 08, 2010

Funny oneliners

I really like these.

Birds of a feather flock together . . . .and then shit on your car. (Sorry for the crude word but poop wouldn't have been as funny)

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL.

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth, think of Algebra.


Get a FREE copy of 101 Humorous Oneliners Here

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Sad But Humorous

In yesterday's newspaper I read about a woman who won $20 million in the recent lottery. She had just come through a nasty divorce and had $80 in her bank account. She now had 20 million. Imagine that. ( I love stories where needy people win BIG!!)
Anyway she was interviewed by the press and was asked this question, " What would you like to say to your ex husband right now?" With a twinkle in her eye she replied, " It sure sucks to be you right now, doesn't it."

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

101 Humorous Oneliners



To order the entire 101 Oneliners for only $7.00

Here are 5 one liners from my collection of 101 Humorous Oneliners

1. Expecting life to treat you fairly because you’re a good person is much like expecting a bull not to charge you because you’re a vegetarian.

2. Start each day off with a smile..............and get it over with. W.C. Fields

3. My Mother told me I wouldn’t get far in life because of my procrastination, but I told her,“ Just you Wait!”

4. If you go to a doctor’s office and find all the plants dead, get yourself another doctor. Erma Bombeck

5. If at first you don’t succeed, so much for sky diving

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

How to Be Funny In Just 60 Minutes

Hi. Everyone wants to be funny and make people laugh. It is a great feeling and a confidence builder to be sure. I have put together a special report on the subject. If interested in knowing more about it Click Here